What’s a skill that’s commonly overlooked in business because it’s “just” a soft skill? Emotional intelligence (also known as EQ).

Many tend to prioritise technical skills over empathy. But emotional intelligence is crucial to any business in order to run a tight, efficient ship with a group of empowered, confident, and creative individuals. 

Leaders who are emotionally intelligent raise up their employees and know how to connect with them. This is significant because understanding the people you lead can give you a better blueprint on how to guide them and deliver feedback in a way that works for them. 

Everyone operates differently and for a leader to acknowledge that and adapt lets that person feel listened to and cared for, building a more meaningful, long-lasting relationship.

Leadership without empathy leads to higher staff turnover, anxiety in the team, and disinterest in the job. This is because they don’t feel like they’re being valued—not just as employees, but even as people. If they work out of the desire not to fail rather than to succeed, it becomes a difficult, disquieting job instead of an enriching one. 

Satya Nadella, CEO of Microsoft, is a great example. After a very public and embarrassing failure with a Twitter bot that was launched under his watch, he chose not to chastise his engineers and, instead, show them empathy. “Keep pushing and know that I am with you… (The) key is to keep learning and improving,” he wrote to them.

What is Emotional Intelligence? 

Emotional intelligence is defined as the ability to understand your own feelings, as well as others’ feelings and being able to respond accordingly. It’s the ability to be aware of yourself, to regulate your emotions and impulses, to empathise, and work with others respectfully. 

In a business context, it has emerged as one of the most crucial skills to have (either as an employee or an employer) because of the way an emotionally intelligent person can adapt, learn, stay socially aware, and empathise with others, leading to a better work atmosphere. 

In fact, it’s become a preference for over 71% of employers because of how these people can learn and adapt. Development Dimensions International (DDI), a global leadership firm, ranked empathy as the number one leadership skill over all others, saying that leaders who empathise well rank 40% higher in business advisory and coaching. 

People who have high EQ are also 90% more likely to move up the ladder compared to a co-worker who has roughly the same skill set and IQ. And studies show that employees are 4.6 times more likely to feel empowered and do their best at work when they feel they are being heard. When they see communication as a two-way street, they find it more meaningful to do their jobs under the guidance of their leader.

What are the positives (and negatives) of emotional intelligence in leadership? 

In terms of positives, studies show that EQ-based training can result in almost eight times return on investment (as compared to non-EQ training). It also builds a positive work environment and better teamwork—your employees will be more compassionate and motivated to work with people they have meaningful connections with.

There are negatives too, however, as with all things. People who are highly emotionally intelligent might be too afraid to criticise others too heavily and will want to avoid stepping on toes. They may also become too careful and not risk as much, playing it too safe and not wanting to make daring choices, which is sometimes necessary in a leader. Still, it’s clear that the positives outweigh the negatives in EQ-based leadership. 

Ursula Burns, CEO of Xerox from 2009 to 2016, had to learn the intricacies of emotional intelligence very quickly. Early in her career, she wore her emotions plainly and it scared her employees. “You can destroy someone by showing your emotions, particularly negative ones… As chief executive, you have to consciously set the right tone, and Ursula worked to develop that,” wrote Anne Mulcahy, predecessor of Burns. 

Burns eventually adapted and became self-confident and trusting of her team. She improved the culture and Xerox thrived. 

5 ways to improve your emotional intelligence 

Daniel Goleman, science journalist and author of several emotional intelligence books, pinpointed five key emotional intelligence skills throughout the course of his work: 

1. Self-awareness

Understanding how you feel and being able to reflect and assess those feelings are necessary to being self-aware. Self-awareness dictates that you acknowledge your strengths while still admitting your weaknesses and always seek to improve on them. 

Because of this, you have to be reflective of what you feel and do. Think about why something makes you upset, dissect that feeling for what it is and dig deep. Be introspective and don’t be afraid to face the feelings you might deem ugly. 

2. Self-regulation

Now that you’re able to detect your emotions through self-awareness, you have to manage them. Your impulses might inform an action before you can even catch yourself but with self-regulation, you can evaluate yourself before responding. 

Take a breath before reacting to an emotion—are you righteous in your frustration? Is there a better way to communicate it? Remember that you could be having the worst day but you are never entitled to taking it out on anyone else. Be accountable for your actions and you can build trust with others. 

3. Motivation

Motivation is the drive to achieve your goals in an optimistic way. Motivated people are positive in their pursuit and can inspire those around them. This is especially key in leadership as you act as a guide to your team. A motivated leader runs a motivated ship.

This is not to say that a motivated leader never fails. In the face of failure, a motivated leader will accept the failure and take the opportunity to learn, instead. Remember: Measuring success doesn’t mean you cannot fail, just that you learn as you journey forward. 

4. Empathy

Empathy is the ability to put yourself in another person’s place or situation and see things from their perspective. Similar to sympathy in that you recognise someone’s emotions but you go beyond just understanding and you try to experience what they’re experiencing.

Doing this gives you better introspection into their position and how to best handle the situation. If an employee is visibly anxious around you, try to see things from their point-of-view and work from there to find a solution. 

5. Social skills

Being socially tuned-in can do wonders for you as a leader. Not only are you paying attention, you’re also open to communication and have an inviting air about you. It puts people at ease and makes it easier for them to open up about any conflict or issues they might have.

Instead of letting your employees come to you, you can open up the conversation yourself, something they might be afraid to do. Being prompted with questions about if they’re satisfied or not might be more effective than waiting for people to approach you. Being proactive with communication and showing concern can greatly develop your emotional intelligence.

Daniel Goleman, psychologists, and even business advisors would strongly recommend that these five key aspects be worked on in order to succeed. Leadership backed by strong emotional intelligence can motivate a team and keep them happy in the long run, making a business much more successful. After all, people follow human leaders invested in their growth more than business owners who are only interested in numbers. 

In the modern world, we no longer measure a leader solely by their business success, but also by how they respond to their emotions and their team’s emotions. A contemporary business leader must be able to respond to their employees’ feelings, communicate, and empathise in order for their business to thrive and for their team to be confident and motivated.
If you’re a leader who wants more information and guidance on this topic, book a call with us.